I’d like to forget about the times I stayed awake in constant fear of nothing
I want to move on from those days where the only thing I did was pace
Pace around the empty house all day, worrying, while the world moved on without a care outside
Worrying about where and how my life was going or when it was ending.

It seems I have forgotten how to cry.
It does not matter how tragic the event
Or how overwhelming my emotions become;
Tears just never see to run down my face
Is there something wrong with me?
Is my soul damaged
Or are my tear ducts dried up from overuse?

I almost envy my younger self…almost. He was always kind, optimistic, forgiving. Even when he was in danger he’d find the courage to pull through. I always said that I disliked him, who I was back then. I always said that he made a lot of stupid decisions, was naïve and dumb…but he was a kid.